back to where you once belonged
sourdough pretzels and food for when reality sucks
Ah, January: the only month of the year statistically proven to be 4 months long. On Tuesday I was asked what I did over the weekend and I really had to think hard to remember, because it felt like a week ago. The first month of the year is almost never a good time and in 2022 it feels, not to put too fine a point on it, extremely rough! We were relieved of the snow and icy weather of the previous weeks only to be hit almost immediately with another rainstorm, the fear of which plagued my thoughts for days before its arrival (thankfully it turned out to be less intense than expected). But I was surprised to find there was room in my brain for more worries, since I assumed the anxiety chamber was already full up with feelings about omicron. As we watch more of our friends, family members, and coworkers get sick while our governments twiddle their thumbs, fretting about the economy, I feel increasingly helpless, angry, and abandoned.
Because it’s not in my power to change much of anything on this front, I’ve been funnelling my rage and existential dread into distracting tasks. Namely, I’ve been knitting in front of the television (we finally watched Get Back and I finished a sweater I started in August), organizing and tidying up, and cooking. I actually cleaned the bottom of the toaster oven last Saturday— that’s how you know things are bad. But at least it means we’ve been eating well, and I hope that the emotional breakdown charted through food within this newsletter will help you do so, too. Also, a reminder to please feel free to message me if you’ve made and enjoyed something after I’ve written about it! I simply love to hear it, and any little crumb of happiness right now is highly valued.
Speaking of happiness, we did get a chance to finally try the donuts at Cream Pony which re-opened recently (see photo above). I say with confidence after trying their cruller and raspberry jam ones that they’ve earned a place in my local donut power rankings— too many places ignore the humble majesty of the cruller! And it is thrilling to no longer have to get in my car if I have a craving for a delicious fancy donut. In unrelated but still joyful news, we’ve started growing blue oyster mushrooms using a kit, and they’re just starting to pop up now after a few days of being misted regularly in their little humidity tent. Hopefully in a week or so we’ll get to eat the first batch of them!
I should probably just retire one of my two sourdough starters at this point, because I never need more than one loaf of bread in a week and it seems to just be a constant struggle to find something to do with the second starter when it comes time to feed it. But on the other hand, it led me to make sourdough pretzels over the weekend, so who can say if it’s bad or not. I used the ingredients in this King Arthur recipe (omitting the dry milk and using milk in place of the water), but knowing they’d come out more like breadsticks if I went straight to baking them after such a short rise, I abandoned the method included. I let them rise for a couple hours on the counter, and then put the dough in the fridge overnight because I didn’t want to make pretzels at 10pm. The next day, I rolled them out after letting the dough come back to room temperature for about an hour. I think next time I’d let the pretzels rise a little more after forming, too, since mine were decent but could have been a bit fluffier.
The secret to the smooth, deep brown crust on the pretzels you get at brew pubs and food carts is boiling them with food-grade lye: a deeply terrifying concept for most of us because it is caustic, just like the lye used in soap making (as we all recall from Fight Club). Baking soda is something the majority of us already have and are not afraid of, it just creates a less intense reaction. You can also achieve a slightly darkened exterior with a little molasses or brown sugar in the water. I used 2 tablespoons of soda and 1 of brown sugar in 2 litres of water. The pretzels, added in batches, only take a few seconds to start to float to the top with a glossy outside, then you can fish them out and put them on a baking sheet to coat with egg wash or melted butter, and plenty of coarse salt (I used fleur de sel).
I baked them for about 15 minutes at 450°F, and they came out golden brown outside and soft inside. They harden up quickly though, so best to eat them within 24 hours. For a nice afternoon snack I made a fancy mustard to dip them in by mixing together yellow, dijon, and grainy mustards with a little honey and pickle brine, and had a beer on the side so we could fantasize that we were having a normal time at the brewery.
I’ve had this fennel tart with smoked salmon saved for months and months, but never had the opportunity to make it because I never seemed to have any smoked salmon, and Jeff can’t eat mascarpone. But the stars aligned this week as we had some local lox we got on sale, and a vegan herbed Boursin-style cheese called Voursin, which meant it could be lactose free and no one would have to chop up a bunch of herbs. It was easy to make: slice the fennel, prepare the cheese base while it’s marinating, then roll out the dough and assemble. The capers and smoked salmon are added after baking, along with a squeeze of lemon. The zest and juice work wonderfully with the flavour of the fennel, which is mildly herbal and caramelized after cooking, and the smokiness and salt of the salmon and capers complement but don’t overwhelm. The recipe categorizes this as an appetizer, but I think that assumes you have guests to share it with. We devoured the majority of it for dinner, and I enjoyed my remaining slice cold the next morning for breakfast.
My mom shared this recipe with me, knowing she can’t cook something with this amount of chilies and have my stepdad live to tell the tale, and I couldn’t wait to make it: noodles with shiitakes, fried tofu, & chili crisp. I bought chili crisp before Christmas and hadn’t yet gotten around to opening it, so I was excited to have a guaranteed opportunity to use some. First I want to say that I made a half recipe and we still had leftovers, so this would serve four people easily as written; I think the full batch would serve two only if you want Anton’s-size portions.
This was incredibly tasty and pretty quick to make, and I don’t know why I always forget about crumbling pressed tofu instead of cutting it into cubes or slices for pan-frying— it gets such a good crispy texture this way, and you end up with excellent sauce coverage. The mix of mushrooms and tofu holds a ton of flavour and really resembles ground meat, and quick-pickled cucumber adds necessary acidity and a little cooling to a salty, spicy dish. I couldn’t get enough of the chili crisp: it’s so garlicky and satisfying, and I love the bit of tingle you get from the Sichuan peppercorns.
You have to hand it to dragon bowls: they are always there to help you use up your random fridge crap in a way that’s usually pretty healthy. I don’t want to imply I’m not thankful for stir-fry, pasta, and soup for doing the same thing, but there’s something about creating a nice grain bowl that feels fresh and exciting no matter what variety of stuff you end up using. I had too many mushrooms, some rapidly aging kale, and two bunches of parsley for some reason, so I made my favourite green goddess dressing from the parsley, roasted the mushrooms, and braised the kale to create a nice assortment to go on top of brown rice.
I also used up some leftover black beans (we’d made the Indian-ish nachos again), and heated up a couple of Gardein chick’n tenders along with the mushrooms to give the bowls a little more texture and protein. Arranging everything in little piles with some cucumber, hemp seeds, and aleppo pepper gives you the instagram-worthy visuals, and without having to endure the toxic positivity of lifestyle influencers.
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You’ve probably already read it, but if you haven’t, I loved Alicia Kennedy’s “On Ritual” this week, speaking to the power of having loose rituals (in her case, a bowl of oatmeal) instead of the rigidity of a strict morning routine. It’s useful to take the time to recognize within ourselves what rituals give us strength, comfort, and stability, versus structures might actually be a source of anxiety rather than a way of dealing with it, as you inevitably fail to meet your too-lofty expectations. As Ina Garten put it in her reply to Reese Witherspoon’s post about habits to improve her life, “That sounds great, but I’m probably not doing any of those things!”
I’m not really an oatmeal guy, but in the morning I make a cup of coffee and then drink it while I do the crossword, and no one should talk to me until I return to the kitchen with my empty mug. I usually need a bit of time of just being awake before I find it reasonable to eat food or have a conversation. Can I function without this ritual? Of course, but my days feel better when I can give myself this little gift before I get started on everything else.
I also appreciated this tip from Bettina Makalintal about weighing down mushrooms in the pan to squeeze out the water and maximize the sear— definitely worth trying! I used this technique when frying the leeks for the leek vinaigrette here and was really happy with the results, so I’m excited to do this for a sandwich or something once my crop of oyster mushrooms is ready, or I get a good deal on some maitakes.
Thanks for reading— if you enjoyed this newsletter, please share it with someone new! I like providing this to you for free, but it does still involve time and effort, so donations I can use towards cookbooks or future treats are much appreciated. Finally, in these tough times, I simply wish to be him.